What did you do with your life, so far???
Think back about your life. You have really accomplished a lot. Do not let some bad thoughts ruin all the good.
I use to think that I didn’t to a whole lot with my life. I have done a lot when I really think about it. Not just the depression parts.
I babysat.
I went to college for a while.
I went through burying my Dad.
My first Brother-in-law was killed in a car wreck after getting a purple heart in Vietnam.
I was a waitress, of course, for a year.
I learned to be a telephone operator and worked at that for 12 years.
I worked in a Garden Center for a year. You stay nice and busy there.
I worked as a practically self taught Veterinary Assistant for 15 years. One of the vets that helped me a lot, was killed in a car wreck. That was very hard.
He taught me how to hold animals and work with mean cats. His, of course.
I taught myself how to run tests and do blood work.
I was the Head Tech for many years. It was hard work, but rewarding most of the time.
A friend and I had alpacas for a while. Who knew that I would ever own livestock?
I tried to move to Colorado for my health and it did help clear my lungs.
I tried to open my own Cross-stitch Store and had it for 3 years until I had a heart attack. Not a good thing to do when you pay your own bills. They put in two stints and I had to go to rehab. You cannot run a store from the hospital or rehab. I had a lot of debt to pay off.
My Mom got sick and I worked a part time job at the hospital to have time to help take care of her.
The same friend and Alpaca Partner got me working summers in Skagway, Alaska. That was not planned!
I was the “bookie” as my boss liked to call me. I worked the computer to book tours. And I drove the tours into the Yukon once in a while.
I had a Chauffeur’s Licence for that. Not a CDL.
I did stay and work there for 10 years, two of which I stayed home to help with Mom. She passed away with my sister and I holding her hands.
We had great help from Hospice then. They took care of everything.
I continued to go to Alaska in the summers. I still miss going there.
Then Covid hit and nobody worked.
For some time now my sister was battling with Parkinson’s Disease and still is. She is getting bad enough now that I can’t leave her for the summers any more.
We work hard and travel a lot for her care at different Doctor’s. Some surgeries, her head shaved twice and she is doing OK, but still having trouble walking part of the time.
I then started this blog and selling things on eBay.
I can’t get an outside of the house job now, because, she needs help and has started having Panic Attacks.
She needs to start physical and speech therapy again. It is an ongoing thing with Parkinson’s. You have to keep moving with this disease.
I’m starting to think of a Go-fund-me page or Donate to single women’s Day!!!
A Go-Fund-Me page would be great!!! The way my life is going, I would have to fund someone else. I don’t have money for that so maybe I can think of some other way.
If I became a hooker, I would end up paying the guy!
I did all of this with chronic depression and SAD. Many people died along the way. Many people were born. Many wonderful animals came and went.
But, I did not give up!
A doctor asked me once why I never attempted suicide. And, I said because I will only do it once.
Now, I think I’m too old anyway, why bother.
Never give up on yourself.
There are good things in with the bad. Never give up on yourself. You can have life abundantly, but, it may not be exactly as you thought it would be.
You can laugh and cry, just like everyone else.
You can have life, but, no one ever tells you it will be easy.
If I had to live again to learn this depression lesson, I would be in very big trouble. You might think there is no God so no second lesson. But, is that true? What if there is a God?
Think about your whole life not just the depressive parts.
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